TriumphAnt

There may be no perfect answer to the question, “What the heck is Canada Day all about?”, but here’s a pretty darned good one.

We were invited to a Canada Day barbecue at the in-laws. Since there would be children present, my Significant Other thought it’d be a great idea to hunt down some sparklers for the kids to wave around after dark.

Despite the Canadian statutory holiday designation of July 1, there are open stores to be found. (In fact, just across the river in Quebec, hardly anything is closed in a province that still stubbornly celebrates its own “Fête National” on St Jean-Baptiste Day – June 24th. And given that they just turned 54 of their province’s seats in the federal House of Commons over to the sovereignist Bloc Québecois, don’t look for things to change anytime soon. But I digress.)

And even in Ontario, corner convenience stores are open and there is a chain of them – “Quickie” – that always has a variety of fireworks for sale. This, however, I only discovered after failing to find any in our own neighbourhood corner store and asking where they might be found. But it was my encounter there that prompted the observation that opened this brief entry.

When I asked, “Do you sell sparklers?”, the helpful clerk behind the counter pointed vaguely to a refrigerated shelf along one wall. I wandered over there, thinking that the arsenal of explosives was probably in a floor display or on an adjacent shelf.

Nothing.

So I spread my arms helplessly and turned back to the clerk, asking, “Where should I be looking?”

“Right there,” he said, pointing back along a straight line that was dead on the path where I stood between him and the refrigerator. I turned back and saw in front of me only the refrigerator. Now I’m beginning to wonder if for some peculiar reason they are refrigerating fireworks in this store.

The helpful clerk finally removed himself from his position behind the counter and came racing over – yes to the refrigerator. Reaching in front of me, he said, “It’s the last one we have left,” and proudly grasped…

A bottle of pickled asparagus.

So now I know that, to the East Asian Canadian’s ear, “sparklers” sounds a lot like “asparagus”.

When our good-humoured communication finally determined what I was seeking, he directed me to the nearest Quickie where they not only sold sparklers, they sold GREAT sparklers!

But I quietly laughed about my sparkler / asparagus discussion for several long minutes afterwards.

And just to put the icing on the maple cake, as I was driving back home with my newly purchased sparklers I caught a glimpse, off in the distance, of the signature diamond formation of the Snowbirds as they lined up for another pass over the National Aviation Museum.

Happy Canada Day, everyone! I am Canadian!